banjax Posted September 29, 2010 Posted September 29, 2010 Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery? If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes? Why do we say something is out of whack? What's a whack? If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented? If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled? If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person who drives a race car not called a racist? Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites? Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things? Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one? "I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence? If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed? If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP? Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks? What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men? I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks, so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks? Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do, write to them? Why don't they just put their pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen can look for them while they deliver the mail? If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for? No one ever says, "It's only a game" when their team is winning. Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag?
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