arfur mo Posted September 19, 2013 Posted September 19, 2013 A PIRATE WALKED INTO A BAR............... and the bartender said: "Hey, I haven't seen you in a while. What happened? You look terrible." "What do you mean?" said the pirate, "I feel fine." "What about the wooden leg? You didn't have that before." "Well," said the pirate, "We were in a battle, and I got hit with a cannon ball, but I'm fine now." The bartender replied, "Well, OK, but what about that hook? What happened to your hand?" The pirate explained, "We were in another battle. I boarded a ship and got into a sword fight. My hand was cut off. I got fitted with a hook but I'm fine, really." "What about that eye patch?" "Oh," said the pirate, "One day we were at sea, and a flock of birds flew over. I looked up, and one of them pooed in my eye." "You're kidding," said the bartender. "You couldn't lose an eye just from bird poo." "It was my first day with the hook!" If you think education is difficult, try being stupid!!!!
RichL Posted September 19, 2013 Posted September 19, 2013 like Originally said by Charles Babbage On two occasions I have been asked [by members of Parliament], 'Pray, Mr. Babbage, if you put into the machine wrong figures, will the right answers come out?' I am not able rightly to apprehend the kind of confusion of ideas that could provoke such a question.
matthew.brough Posted September 19, 2013 Posted September 19, 2013 Funny www.securitywarehouse.co.uk/catalog/
datadiffusion Posted September 20, 2013 Posted September 20, 2013 And its goodnight from him! So, I've decided to take my work back underground.... to stop it falling into the wrong hands
arfur mo Posted September 24, 2013 Author Posted September 24, 2013 Wife comes home late at night and quietly opens the door to her bedroom. From under the blanket she sees four legs instead of two! She reaches for a baseball bat and starts hitting the blanket as hard as she can. Once she’s done, she goes to the kitchen to have a drink. As she enters, she sees her husband there, reading a magazine. “Hi darling”, he says, “Your parents have come to visit us,so I let them stay in our bedroom. Hope you have said hello to them." If you think education is difficult, try being stupid!!!!
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